Whole 30 - Day 9
So, I'm almost one third of the way through the Whole 30 challenge. I noticed for the first time today that my clothes are a wee bit looser. I've noticed that my energy levels are, on average, much higher than they've been in years. I've noticed a distinct decrease in upper abdominal bloating. I've noticed less water retention in my hands and feet. I've noticed that this is getting easier, until....
Until I'm faced with a house full of kids that I wasn't anticipating and I think about ordering a pizza for dinner and it causes huge anxiety.
Until it comes time for snack and it's Oreos day and my little right hand (my little Honey) is fine passing out the cookies, but doesn't know what to do with the single cookie leftover, so she waves it in my face saying, "For you, Mommy".
Until I go onto Pinterest.
Until dinner involves cooking for kids who refuse to eat anything green, then having to cook for myself, all the time running a continuous mental list of what I should be doing instead of cooking and cleaning up after two different meals.
<sigh>
OK, rant is over. All things considered, I'm very glad I'm doing this, and hopefully, all that other stuff will iron itself out with time and repetition and constant planning. I mean, by definition, this challenge is called Whole 30, not Whole Forever. The idea is to do it and see in real terms what eating REAL FOOD means; the good, the bad, and the inconvenient. It's actually something I've wanted to do for quite some time and just haven't.
So what's the problem? Why, when the results have already been so positive, am I finding difficulty in accepting and embracing the process?
I think it's not the process that's the problem. I think the problem is that I've once again failed to recognize that I'm an addict. So many of the things that are better now than they were 10 days ago are better because my body is no longer responding to the allergy/addiction cycle of the foods that are so bad for me.
Some people can have one cookie. I cannot. Some people can have a few bites out of a Ben & Jerry's. I cannot. Some people can easily, almost EAGERLY share a doughnut with a friend - not me. I want it all, and I will eat it in private if it will keep me from feeling obligated to share it. I'm an addict. I think that the problem is that if I'm real about this, if I am honest about how much this is benefiting me, I have to also recognize that if I can't have one cookie, I should probably not have even one cookie.
So for me.... if it's going to work and do what it's supposed to do, this really is Whole Forever. And like any addict, I find this to be so daunting and extremely sad; I have to leave my forever love because it's just no good for me. And if I'm honest, I have to admit that it's breaking my heart.
I'm so sad. And by sad, I mean pathetic.
Here are my less pathetic goals for the week:
1. One day at a time, baby! I know I can do this!
2. Look for ways to make this easier in terms of LIFE.
3. Remember daily, maybe even hourly, WHY I'm doing this. Sure, I want to be thin and wear cute clothes. But the real reason, the one that matters the most, is that I want to play with my youngest child's children. And I don't want her to have them until she's graduated college. Unless she's as brilliant as I think she is and she graduates college at the age of 20, in which case, I want her to be at least 25. So I need to live at least 20 more years. I would prefer to live another 40 or more, to be honest.
4. Get over it! Seriously!
Wednesday, September 12, 2012
Thursday, September 6, 2012
Skinny Betches really DO shop at Trader Joe's!
Whole 30 - Day 3
AAAAHHHHHHHHH!
No, seriously, it's not that bad. :-) Yesterday was a little worse, actually. I had to enter all the meals from my daycare for August into the computer program that tracks that stuff. So, I had to endure hours of constant suggestions of comfort foods. Chili dogs, Mac & Cheese, turkey burgers, grilled cheese, etc. THAT was torturous! And with every meal, MILK! I really like milk, but never in my life did I think I would catch myself daydreaming about it!
So yesterday's meals were within the realm of Whole 30 meals, but they were more comforty than is probably recommended. But it got me through the day.
Today was better. I started my day with a banana and an apple. I still didn't have time for a real lunch, but I was fine with a handful of cashews. Here it is almost 9:00 and I haven't had dinner yet. I'm realizing that my schedule isn't very conducive to the healthy eating I want to do. I'm going to have to find a way around that. Iker suggested prepping stuff ahead of time, which makes a lot of sense, but I'm having difficulty keeping up with the time I have on hand, let alone try to plan ahead. I do know it's something to work on, though.
Thank the Good Lord for George Foreman!
The good news is that my cravings are far better today than yesterday. I'm also not very hungry, which is quite nice. It's a bit early yet, but I haven't yet seen or felt any discernible differences in how I feel, yet, but I'm pretty hopeful.
So, I went to Trader Joe's the other day. Anybody who's read previous posts might remember that my older daughter told me that Skinny Betches shop there and I had a load of reasons why I didn't want to be that Skinny Betch. Well, let me tell you, she was right! Trader Joe's is SWIMMING with Skinny Betches! And they're really nice! I had conversations with them and everything! They helped me translate the healthy food-speak that still floats over my head. They were encouraging as I told them about my challenge, and they had helpful suggestions. I was quite enlightened and a bit uplifted by my sojourn into the whole food mecca. I will probably go back!
AAAAHHHHHHHHH!
No, seriously, it's not that bad. :-) Yesterday was a little worse, actually. I had to enter all the meals from my daycare for August into the computer program that tracks that stuff. So, I had to endure hours of constant suggestions of comfort foods. Chili dogs, Mac & Cheese, turkey burgers, grilled cheese, etc. THAT was torturous! And with every meal, MILK! I really like milk, but never in my life did I think I would catch myself daydreaming about it!
So yesterday's meals were within the realm of Whole 30 meals, but they were more comforty than is probably recommended. But it got me through the day.
Today was better. I started my day with a banana and an apple. I still didn't have time for a real lunch, but I was fine with a handful of cashews. Here it is almost 9:00 and I haven't had dinner yet. I'm realizing that my schedule isn't very conducive to the healthy eating I want to do. I'm going to have to find a way around that. Iker suggested prepping stuff ahead of time, which makes a lot of sense, but I'm having difficulty keeping up with the time I have on hand, let alone try to plan ahead. I do know it's something to work on, though.
Thank the Good Lord for George Foreman!
The good news is that my cravings are far better today than yesterday. I'm also not very hungry, which is quite nice. It's a bit early yet, but I haven't yet seen or felt any discernible differences in how I feel, yet, but I'm pretty hopeful.
So, I went to Trader Joe's the other day. Anybody who's read previous posts might remember that my older daughter told me that Skinny Betches shop there and I had a load of reasons why I didn't want to be that Skinny Betch. Well, let me tell you, she was right! Trader Joe's is SWIMMING with Skinny Betches! And they're really nice! I had conversations with them and everything! They helped me translate the healthy food-speak that still floats over my head. They were encouraging as I told them about my challenge, and they had helpful suggestions. I was quite enlightened and a bit uplifted by my sojourn into the whole food mecca. I will probably go back!
Tuesday, September 4, 2012
The Skinny Betch is grumbling....
So, the long, hot summer is almost over, and I've put on a nice layer fat for the winter. It should keep me nice and warm while I hibernate. Except that I'M NOT AN EFFING BEAR!
Needless to say, I've more than made up for the 10 pounds I lost last Spring. Or was it Winter? Whichever. Anyway, I was messing around a few weeks ago and posted on Facebook that I was eating something marginally healthy, when all of a sudden, all these people started posting comments about how great it is that I'm eating healthy and taking care of myself.
Now, hold up....
I had a wild hair and decided I wanted some celery and decided to listen to that voice before the voice that wanted Ben & Jerry's got too loud, and all of a sudden I've got virtual cheerleaders trying to make me feel all good and noble about it? What the...? I felt two things almost instantaneously: 1) I felt every bit the Fat Chick I know myself to be but have spent the summer hiding from, but only moreso because everybody else seems to agree, and 2) apparently, I'm in danger of exploding if I don't fix this crap and NOW!
Among the comments to my healthy snack post was one from somebody, I don't even remember who now. She was talking about Whole 30 and a book called It Starts With Food. Yeah, yeah, yeah.... yawn, yawn, whatever.... Well, I didn't say that. I said something like, "I hate reading non-fiction so, probably not. Thanks, though!" She said, well, just Google Whole30 and take a look. She added on a "It changed my life!" for good measure.
Alright. Fine.
So I Googled Whole30 and took a look-see. What's the first thing I see?
In big purple letters. Well, I'll just be darned.
So I read a bunch of stuff on the website. Whole 30 is a 30-day challenge to let the Whole 9 way of eating, well... CHANGE YOUR LIFE. Yes, there's a book, but pretty much everything you need to know about the mechanics of the Whole 9 way of doing things is right there. The book re-enforces WHY Whole 9 works and is better for you. Essentially, it's eating only meats, veggies, fruits, and nuts. It's keeping ingredients to a minimum, and keeping food as "whole" as possible.
It's no dairy, grains (CORN IS A GRAIN), or legumes. What? No legumes? No peas or lima beans? Be still my beating heart! It's also cutting out all sugars, artificial and otherwise. I guess sugars that occur naturally, like in fruit, are fine in moderation, but no cane sugar, honey, stevia, or nutrisweet or whatever.
After Googling and look-see-ing, I was very interested, so I got the book. I have read the first chapter. That's it. That's all it took, really. Today was day one of my own Whole 30 challenge.
Thankfully, I'm not doing this one alone. My good friend and chief cheerleader, Iker S. is doing this with me. Today was his day one as well.
As far as Day Ones go, this hasn't been too heinous. I had two boiled eggs and a bunch of mixed fruit for breakfast. I didn't have time for a formal lunch, but I had a Lara Bar. I'll be having turkey burger patties and a spinach salad for dinner. One concession I'm making, but only until Thursday is Diet Coke. I can't have a caffeine headache in the middle of my week when children are present and making noise. It's more danger than I want to take on.
A weird note about this morning: Both Iker and I felt better before we even started our day. It's hard to explain, but I actually felt thinner and more energetic without even eating a thing! Just knowing that I was doing this made me feel great! Like my life was changing or something!
In case you are interested....
Link to Whole30
Needless to say, I've more than made up for the 10 pounds I lost last Spring. Or was it Winter? Whichever. Anyway, I was messing around a few weeks ago and posted on Facebook that I was eating something marginally healthy, when all of a sudden, all these people started posting comments about how great it is that I'm eating healthy and taking care of myself.
Now, hold up....
I had a wild hair and decided I wanted some celery and decided to listen to that voice before the voice that wanted Ben & Jerry's got too loud, and all of a sudden I've got virtual cheerleaders trying to make me feel all good and noble about it? What the...? I felt two things almost instantaneously: 1) I felt every bit the Fat Chick I know myself to be but have spent the summer hiding from, but only moreso because everybody else seems to agree, and 2) apparently, I'm in danger of exploding if I don't fix this crap and NOW!
Among the comments to my healthy snack post was one from somebody, I don't even remember who now. She was talking about Whole 30 and a book called It Starts With Food. Yeah, yeah, yeah.... yawn, yawn, whatever.... Well, I didn't say that. I said something like, "I hate reading non-fiction so, probably not. Thanks, though!" She said, well, just Google Whole30 and take a look. She added on a "It changed my life!" for good measure.
Alright. Fine.
So I Googled Whole30 and took a look-see. What's the first thing I see?
LET US CHANGE YOUR LIFE
In big purple letters. Well, I'll just be darned.
So I read a bunch of stuff on the website. Whole 30 is a 30-day challenge to let the Whole 9 way of eating, well... CHANGE YOUR LIFE. Yes, there's a book, but pretty much everything you need to know about the mechanics of the Whole 9 way of doing things is right there. The book re-enforces WHY Whole 9 works and is better for you. Essentially, it's eating only meats, veggies, fruits, and nuts. It's keeping ingredients to a minimum, and keeping food as "whole" as possible.
It's no dairy, grains (CORN IS A GRAIN), or legumes. What? No legumes? No peas or lima beans? Be still my beating heart! It's also cutting out all sugars, artificial and otherwise. I guess sugars that occur naturally, like in fruit, are fine in moderation, but no cane sugar, honey, stevia, or nutrisweet or whatever.
After Googling and look-see-ing, I was very interested, so I got the book. I have read the first chapter. That's it. That's all it took, really. Today was day one of my own Whole 30 challenge.
Thankfully, I'm not doing this one alone. My good friend and chief cheerleader, Iker S. is doing this with me. Today was his day one as well.
As far as Day Ones go, this hasn't been too heinous. I had two boiled eggs and a bunch of mixed fruit for breakfast. I didn't have time for a formal lunch, but I had a Lara Bar. I'll be having turkey burger patties and a spinach salad for dinner. One concession I'm making, but only until Thursday is Diet Coke. I can't have a caffeine headache in the middle of my week when children are present and making noise. It's more danger than I want to take on.
A weird note about this morning: Both Iker and I felt better before we even started our day. It's hard to explain, but I actually felt thinner and more energetic without even eating a thing! Just knowing that I was doing this made me feel great! Like my life was changing or something!
In case you are interested....
Link to Whole30
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